Two Homes, One Heart: Kids Program
If your parents are getting a divorce and it feels confusing or scary, you’re not alone.
Sometimes parents fight, and when they split up, it can feel like a big change. This will help you understand what’s going on and show you ways to feel better, even when things feel messy.
You can’t change what your parents do, but you can learn how to make yourself feel safe and happy. Let’s figure this out together!
Download the workbook, or go through it online.
If you need help right now, these services are available.
Note to Parents, Caregivers, and Professionals: The Two Homes, One Heart program is designed to support children and teens as they navigate the complexities of high-conflict divorce or separation. While this program incorporates common counselling strategies, it is not a substitute for professional counseling or psychiatric care and is not meant to provide legal advice.
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Why is this happening?
Maybe you feel like everything was fine, and now your family feels different. No matter how it happened, your feelings are important.
Maybe you feel like everything was fine, and now your family feels different. No matter how it happened, your feelings are important.
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You are awesome! Don’t forget it.
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Waiting for things to be normal again
You might wish that everything would go back to how it was before.
You might wish that everything would go back to how it was before.
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Feeling big feelings
Sometimes you might feel really mad, or really sad, or even really tired from all the changes happening. That’s okay!
Sometimes you might feel really mad, or really sad, or even really tired from all the changes happening. That’s okay!
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You are not a messenger
Sometimes parents might ask you to tell the other parent something. That’s not your job
Sometimes parents might ask you to tell the other parent something. That’s not your job
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You can still have fun and feel safe.
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Setting boundaries
If a parent asks you too many questions or makes you feel bad, it’s okay to set boundaries.
If a parent asks you too many questions or makes you feel bad, it’s okay to set boundaries.
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Those feelings are normal, but you don’t have to keep them inside.
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You have a voice. (Even When You Don’t Have a Choice)
Some things are not choices for you, because they are important decisions parents must make for kids.
Some things are not choices for you, because they are important decisions parents must make for kids.
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You still get to dream big and have fun!
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Disengage
Divorce can be really confusing, especially when you're a kid. You might feel sad, mad, or even think it's your fault. But guess what? It’s NOT your fault. Grown-ups have problems that kids shouldn’t have to fix. Your job is to be a kid, have fun, and feel safe. This chapter will help you understand what’s happening and how to feel better. Let’s go!
Divorce can be really confusing, especially when you're a kid. You might feel sad, mad, or even think it's your fault. But guess what? It’s NOT your fault. Grown-ups have problems that kids shouldn’t have to fix. Your job is to be a kid, have fun, and feel safe. This chapter will help you understand what’s happening and how to feel better. Let’s go!
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Decide
Sometimes, making choices can feel really tricky—especially when people around you don’t agree. Maybe your parents are divorced and keep asking you to choose between them, or maybe you feel like no matter what you do, someone will be upset.
Good news: You don’t have to fix everything! This guide will help you make choices in a way that feels good for YOU.
Sometimes, making choices can feel really tricky—especially when people around you don’t agree. Maybe your parents are divorced and keep asking you to choose between them, or maybe you feel like no matter what you do, someone will be upset.
Good news: You don’t have to fix everything! This guide will help you make choices in a way that feels good for YOU.
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Talk, share, listen, be heard
Talking to your parents can feel tricky, especially when they are going through a divorce. Maybe you feel like they don’t listen, or they don’t understand how you feel.
Good news: You can learn how to talk to them in a way that helps them listen!
Talking to your parents can feel tricky, especially when they are going through a divorce. Maybe you feel like they don’t listen, or they don’t understand how you feel.
Good news: You can learn how to talk to them in a way that helps them listen!
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Have. Feel. Move.
Divorce can be confusing and sometimes scary, especially when parents fight a lot. If your parents are arguing, saying mean things, or making you feel stuck in the middle, this workbook is here to help you!
You are not responsible for their arguments.
This workbook will help you understand your feelings, learn how to feel better, and find ways to stay happy even when things are hard.
Divorce can be confusing and sometimes scary, especially when parents fight a lot. If your parents are arguing, saying mean things, or making you feel stuck in the middle, this workbook is here to help you!
You are not responsible for their arguments.
This workbook will help you understand your feelings, learn how to feel better, and find ways to stay happy even when things are hard.
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FAQs
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No. Parents divorce because of grown up problems between them, not because of anything you did or didn’t do. It’s never a kid’s fault.
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No, but you can take care of yourself by doing fun things, talking to a safe adult, and remembering it’s not your job to fix their problems.
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You don’t have to pick sides. You can say, “I don’t want to talk about that,” and then go do something else.
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Big feelings are normal. Try deep breaths, drawing, hugging a stuffed animal, or talking to someone you trust.
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That’s not your job. You can say, “You should talk to mom/dad about that.”
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Yes. Even if they argue, they both still love you very much.
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It will take everyone a different amount of time, and there’s no rush. Do it in your own time!